The Way Toward Health - May 29, 1984

Chapter 9: You, You, You, and You.  Living at Cross Purposes

May 29, 1984

Each person is so unique that it is obviously impossible for me to discuss all of the innumerable and complicated strands of belief that form human experience – yet I hope here, some way, to present enough “specific generalizations” so that you the reader can find many points of application as far as your own life is concerned.

In fact, you may discover not just one you, but several you’s, so to speak, each pursuing certain purposes, and you may find out furthermore that some such purposes cancel others out, while some are diametrically opposed to each other.  Such cross purposes, of course, can lead to mental, spiritual, physical and emotional difficulties.

Many people believe that it is dangerous to make themselves known, to express their own ideas or abilities.  Such individuals may be highly motivated, on the other hand, to become accomplished in some art or profession or other field of activity.  In such cases, you have two cross-purposes operating – the desire to express oneself, and the fear of doing so.

If both beliefs are equally dominant and vital, then the situation becomes quite serious.  Such individuals may try “to get ahead” on the one had, in society or business or in the arts or sciences, only to find themselves taking two steps backward for every step they take forward.  In other words, they will encounter obstructions that are self-generated.  If such a person begins to succeed, then he or she is forcibly reminded of the equally dominant need for lack of success – for again, the person believes that self-expression is necessary and desirable while also being highly dangerous, and thus to be avoided.

Dilemmas result in many ways.  The person might succeed financially, only to make a serious or faulty business judgment, thus losing the financial benefits.  Another person might express the same dilemma through the body itself, so that “getting ahead” was equated with physical mobility – so that it seemed that physical mobility, while so desired, was still highly dangerous.

Such reasoning sounds quite outlandish, of course, to most individuals, but the person in question, say with a disease like arthritis, or some other motion-impairing ailment, might ask themselves the question: “What would I do if I were free of the condition?”

Like the alcoholic’s wife mentioned earlier, such a person might suddenly feel struck by a sense of panic, rather than relief, thus experiencing for the first time the fear of motion that underlay the problem.

Yet why should motion be feared?  Because so many individuals have been taught that power or energy is wrong, destructive, or sinful, and therefore to be punished.

Often playful, rambunctious children are told not to be showoffs, or not to express their normal exuberance.  Religions stress the importance of discipline, sobriety, and penance.  All of these attitudes can be extremely detrimental, and along with other beliefs are responsible for a goodly number of spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional problems.

Unfortunately, there are also some particular teachings that are sexually oriented, and that therefore show their effects often on one sex rather than the other.  Boys are still taught to “be cool”, unemotional, aggressive, and assertive – as opposed to being emotionally warm, cooperative, gregarious but without fake bravado.  Boys are taught that it is unmanly to be dependent in any way.  They become embarrassed in late boyhood when kissed by their mothers, as a rule – yet it is quite natural to be both independent and dependent, cooperative and competitive.

Such young men grow up with the desire to be independent, while at the same time they also experience the natural drive for cooperation and dependence upon others.  Many end up punishing themselves for any behavior they consider dependent or unmanly.  They are often afraid to express love, or to accept emotional nourishment gracefully.

As a result, some such people become severely afflicted with ulcers, so that their stomachs become sore and ulcerated at the acceptance of physical nourishment.

The Way Toward Health - May 28, 1984

May 28, 1984

If you are in serious difficulties of any kind, it may at first seem inconceivable, unbelievable, or even scandalous to imagine that your problems are caused by your own beliefs.

In fact, the opposite might appear to be true.  You might have lost a series of jobs, for example, and it may seem quite clear that you are not to blame in any of those circumstances.  You might have a serious illness that seemed to come from nowhere, and it may strike you as most unlikely indeed, that your own beliefs had anything to do with the inception of such a frightening malady.

You may be in the middle of one or several very unsatisfactory relationships, none of which seem to be caused by you, while instead you feel as if you are an unwilling victim or participant.

You may have a dangerous drug or alcohol problem, or you may be married to someone who does.  In both instances the situations will be caused by your own beliefs, even though this may at first seem most unlikely.  For the purposes of this particular chapter, we will discuss illnesses or situations that have arisen since childhood, so we are not including birth defects or very early life-endangering childhood accidents, or most unfortunate childhood family situations.  These will be discussed separately.

In most cases, even the most severe illnesses or complicated living conditions and relationships are caused by an attempt to grow, develop or expand in the face of difficulties that appear to be unsurmountable to one degree or another.

An individual will often be striving for some goal that appears blocked, and hence he or she uses all available energy and strength to circumnavigate the blockage.  The blockage is usually a belief which needs to be understood or removed rather than bypassed.

In this book, we will be involved with the nature of beliefs and with various methods that will allow you to choose those beliefs that lead to a more satisfying life.

Though this book is entitled The Way Toward Health, we are not speaking of physical health alone, but of mental, spiritual, and emotional health as well.  You are not healthy, for example, no matter how robust your physical condition, if your relationships are unhealthy, unsatisfying, frustrating, or hard to achieve.  Whatever your situation is, it is a good idea to ask yourself what you would do if you were free of it.  An alcoholic’s wife might wish with all her heart that her husband stop drinking – but if she suddenly asked herself what she would do, she might – surprisingly enough – feel a tinge of panic.  On examination of her own thoughts and beliefs, she might well discover that she was so frightened of not achieving her own goals that she actually encouraged her husband’s alcoholism, so that she would not have to face her own “failure”.

Obviously, this hypothetical situation is a quick example of what I mean, with no mention of the innumerable other beliefs and half-beliefs that would encircle the man’s and woman’s relationship.

The Way Toward Health - May 26, 1984

May 26, 1984

Many proponents of reincarnation believe most firmly that an illness in one life most frequently has its roots in a past existence, and that reincarnational regression is therefore necessary to uncover the reasons for many current illnesses or dilemmas.

There is also a rather conventional stereotype version of karma that may follow such beliefs.  Therefore, you may be punished in this life for errors you have committed in a past one, or you may actually be making up for a mistake made thousands of years ago.  Again, all of a person’s reincarnational existences are, indeed, connected – but the events in one life do not cause the events in the next one.

I must remind you once more that all time happens simultaneously, so the confused belief about punishment now, in retaliation for past action would actually be meaningless, since in simultaneous time all actions would be occurring at once.

You may have overall reasons for a particular illness, however, that have nothing to do with crime or punishment, but may instead involve an extraordinary sense of curiosity, and the desire for experience that is somewhat unconventional – usually not sought for – exotic, or in certain terms even grotesque.

Each life, regardless of its nature, possesses its own unique vantage point, and an individual may sometimes take an obscure or a long-lasting disease simply to present himself or herself with experience that most others would shun.  An individual might seek such a vantage point in order to look at the universe in a different fashion, asking questions that perhaps could not be answered if asked from any other position.

Another life, for example, might deal with exquisite health and vitality, and as mentioned, still another life might be devoted to the arts of healing – but overall, few people take health problems per se as frequent reincarnational themes, though they may be implied strongly in situations where one is born into a large populace of poor, underprivileged people.

If you do have health problems, it is much better to look for their reasons in your immediate experience, rather than assigning them a cause in the distant past.  The reasons for maladies are almost always present in current life experience – and even though old events from childhood may have originally activated unhealthy behavior, it is present beliefs that allow old patterns of activity to operate.

If you are concerned about any given problems – mental, emotional, or physical – there are certain facts you should hold in mind.  I have mentioned most of them elsewhere, but they are particularly vital in this context.

You must realize that you do create your own reality because of your beliefs about it.  Therefore, try to understand that the particular dilemma or illness is not an event forced upon you by some other agency.  Realize that to some extent or another your dilemma or your illness has been chosen by you, and that this choosing has been done in bits and pieces of small, seemingly inconsequential choices.  Each choice, however, has led up to your current predicament, whatever its nature.

If you realize that your beliefs form your experience, then you do indeed have an excellent chance of changing your beliefs, and hence your experience.

You can discover what your own reasons are for choosing the dilemma or illness by being very honest with yourself.  There is no need to feel guilty since you meant very well as you made each choice – only the choices were built upon beliefs that were beliefs and not facts.

The Way Toward Health - May 23, 1984

May 23, 1984

On any given day, a youngster may take a ride on a merry-go-round.  The same little boy or girl might also sit astride a toy horse, and pretend that the horse is part of the merry-go-round.  The same child might see the image of the merry-go-round on the television screen, or be told about another youngster’s visit to a playground, and a subsequent ride on a merry-go-round.

The child will be completely absorbed in the merry-go-round ride that was directly experienced.  He or she may indeed by just as engrossed – or even more so – in the imaginary ride on the rocking horse.  There will be some involvement, of course, as the child watches the images of the merry-go-round horses on the television station, while the story about another child’s visit to the playground will not take nearly as much of his interest.

In somewhat the same way, events appear and are reflected in reincarnational existences.  All the lives are actually occurring at the same time, as the hypothetical youngster’s merry-go-round experiences happened all in one day.

In the reincarnational terms, however, the merry-go-round events might be experienced directly in some existences, or appear in a dream in another existence, or turn up simply as an image in another, or happen in an event involving real horses instead of merry-go-round horses.  In other words, in one way or another the events of one living experience are reflected in each other living experience.

I am not saying that events in one life cause the events in another, but that there is an overall pattern – a bank of probable events – and that in each life each individual chooses those that suit his or her overall private purposes.  Yet those lives will be connected.  An individual may have a serious illness in one life.  That event may turn up as one uncomfortable nightmare in another existence.  In still another life, the individual might have a dear friend who suffers from the same disease.  In still another existence the individual might decide to be a doctor, to seek a cause and a cure for the same disease.

No one is fated, however, to suffer in one life for any crimes committed in another.  The reasons and purposes for one’s own existence in any life can be found directly in life itself.

The Way Toward Health - May 22, 1984 - reincarnation

Chapter 8: Children’s Play, Reincarnation, and Health

May 22, 1984

When children play, often the play events seem as real or even more real than ordinary physical events that are experienced outside of the play framework.  Children playing at cowboys and Indians, or cops and robbers, can on occasion become quite as frightened by the pursuit or the chase as they would be if they were actually caught up in such an adventure in ordinary life.

Children then apply their imaginations more vividly, and even utilize all of their senses at certain times, to follow or reinforce those pictures that imagination paints.  There are indeed many kinds of reality, many versions and it is some time before human beings learn to focus into one particular package of reality.

In so doing, they then apply their imaginations in structured ways that serve to reinforce the prime reality-framework.  For some time, however, young children utilize a remarkable imaginative freedom, so that, for example, they can experience “alternate” events with as much focus, strength, and vitality as that with which they experience ordinary life.  A potent daydream may, in fact, appear far more real than the other daily events that surround it.  When the child is playing, its sense of joy or anger or danger is very strongly felt.  The child’s body will often reflect those conditions and reflexes that would be elicited if the so-called “play” events were real.

Most of your experience happens directly, where senses, imagination, motion and physical actually meet.  In dreams, however, you often feel as if you are in another location entirely, and all of your senses seem pivoted in that location.  Your experience is separated from your usual living area, in other words.  You may dream that you are running or walking or flying, yet those activities are divorced enough from that area where imagination, motion, and physical actuality meet, so that your body remains quiet, relatively speaking, while you seem to be moving freely somewhere else.

In a fashion, reincarnation can partially be explained using the same kind of analogy.  You may have many existences at once – but each one has its own living area, upon which that portion of you focuses.  In fact, that portion has its own name and selfhood and is master of its own castle, so to speak.

Each self has its own inviolate point where imagination, motion, and physical actuality intersect.  Like the child play-acting, however, events occur within events, all dramatically real and vivid, all eliciting specific responses and actions, and each one possessing its own private living area.

The Way Toward Health - May 18, 1984

May 18, 1984

I have mentioned before that play is essential for growth and development.  Children learn through play-acting.  They imagine themselves to be in all kinds of situations.  They see themselves in dangerous predicaments, and then conjure up their own methods of escape.  They try out the roles of other family members, imagine themselves rich and poor, old and young, male and female.

This allows children a sense of freedom, independence, and power as they see themselves acting forcibly in all kinds of situations.  It goes without saying that the physical play automatically helps develop the body and its capabilities.

To a child, play and work are often one and the same thing, and parents can utilize imaginative games as a way of reinforcing ideas of health and vitality.  When a child is ill-disposed or cranky, or has a headache, or another disorder that does not appear to be serious, parents can utilize this idea: have the child imagine that you are giving it a “better and better pill”.  Have the child open its mouth while you place the imaginary pill on its tongue, or have the child imagine picking the pill up and placing it in its mouth.  Then give the child a glass of water to wash the pill down, or have the child get the water for himself or herself.  Then have the youngster chant, say, three times, “I’ve taken a better and better pill, so I will shortly feel better and better myself”.

The earlier such a game is begun the better, and as the child grows older you may explain that often an imaginary pill works quite as well – if not better – than a real one.

This does not mean that I am asking parents to substitute imaginary medicine for real medicine, though indeed, I repeat, it may be quite as effective.  In your society, however, it would be almost impossible to get along without medicine or medical science.

While I want to emphasize that point, I also want to remind you that innately and ideally the body is quite equipped to heal itself, and certainly to cure its own momentary headache.  You would have to substitute an entirely different learning system, at your present stage, for the body to show its true potentials and healing abilities.

In other cases of child’s illness, have the child play a healing game, in which he or she playfully imagines being completely healthy again, outdoors and playing; or have the youngster imagine a conversation with a friend, describing the illness as past and gone.  Play could also be used even in old people’s homes, for it could revive feelings of spontaneity and give the conscious mind a rest from worrying.

Many ancient and so-called primitive peoples utilized play – and drama, of course – for their healing values, and often their effects were quite as therapeutic as medical science.  If your child believes that a particular illness is caused by a virus, then suggest a game in which the youngster imagines the virus to be a small bug that he or she triumphantly chases away with a broom, or sweeps out the door.  Once a child gets the idea, the youngster will often make up his or her own game, that will prove most beneficial.

Instead of such procedures, children are often taught to believe that any situation or illness or danger will worsen and that the least desirable, rather than the most desirable, solution will be found.  By such mental games, however, stressing the desirable solution, children can learn at an early age to utilize their imaginations and their minds in a far more beneficial manner.

One of the most disastrous ideas is the belief that illness is sent as punishment by God.

Unfortunately, such a belief is promoted by many religions.  Children who want to be good, therefore, can unfortunately strive for poor health, in the belief that it is a sign of God’s attention.  To be punished by God is often seen as preferable to being ignored by God.  Adults who hold such views unwittingly often let their children in for a life of turmoil and depression.

In all cases of illness, games or play should be fostered whenever possible, and in whatever form.  Many dictatorial religions pointedly refuse to allow their congregations to indulge in any type of play at all, and frown upon it as sinful.  Card-playing family games such as Monopoly are actually excellent practices, and play in any form encourages spontaneity and promotes healing and peace of mind.

The Way Toward Health - May 14, 1984

May 14, 1984

Good health is closely related, of course, to a family’s belief about the body.  If parents believe that a body is somehow an inferior vehicle for the spirit, or if they simply view the body as unreliable or weak and vulnerable, then children will at an early age begin to consider good health as a rarity, and learn to take depression, poor spirits, and bodily aches and pains to be a natural, normal condition of life.

If, on the other hand, parents view the body as a healthy, dependable vehicle of expression and feeling, then their children will look at their own bodies in the same fashion.  It is very important that parents express a fond affection toward each other, and toward their children.  In this way, most children are assured of their parent’s love, and hence need not resort to illness as a way of gaining attention or testing a parent’s love and devotion.

There is no natural reason for children to feel a sense of shame concerning any bodily part.  No portion of the body should be spoken about in secret, hushed tones.  Each child should be told that his body, or her body, is a precious private possession, however, so that it is easy to build up a desirable feeling of bodily privacy, without any hint of shame or guilt.

It goes without saying that parents should hold the bodies of their male and female children in equal favor, so that one is not considered inferior to the other.  Each child should be educated as early as possible by their parents, so that the youngsters are repeatedly reminded of the body’s natural resources and healing abilities.

Parents who are actually quite worried about their children’s susceptibility to illness often go overboard, stressing all kinds of sports and sports-related projects, but the children sense their parents’ unspoken fears, and they try to reassure their parents through achieving high goals or merit in sports programs.

There is no area of thought or belief that does not touch upon the subject of health in one way or another.  Therefore, throughout this book we will be devoted to many ideas that may at first seem unrelated to the topic at hand.